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TOPIC: On the brink

On the brink 1 week 3 days ago #1

Hi Everyone

I have been begging anyone that I need to move out of this old musty house but no one takes it seriously or is willing to move with me and do the things necessary. The smell from some rooms make my breathing bad and I sleep on the sofa now. I have chemical sensitivity, vision problems, high anxiety and stress because of this.
I have no money, unable to work, cannot drive and my partner has had enough. I have no where to go and will be homeless. I cannot get a house as I have tried and cannot get help as no one understands this illness. Can I camp anywhere for free with water facilities? I will need to walk and live in derby.
I have another option as I have purchased something to end my life. It is freezing outside and I have just purchased a woolly hat but am terrified as I'm weak and sick too with bad vision.
I know none of you can help. I hope you all find a way out of this hell and a safe place to live. I'm not mentally or physically able to deal with this anymore.
Love to you all
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On the brink 1 week 11 hours ago #2

  • BL
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Tracey I am sorry that you are in this frightening position, but do not give up hope. I think you have the DNRS DVDs. If you look at the many video testimonials on Annie Hopper's site you will find some where people were desperately ill and unable to live in their home but recovered. I wonder if it might help if I give you my take on the DNRS as I don't know if you have tried it or not yet.

The course might seem overwhelming but I do not think it has to be done religiously. If you try and address as many of the MCS symptoms, thoughts and behaviours as you can with the pattern break technique,each time getting a feeling of joy or peace or relaxation going for a few moments-a big artificial smile also helps- then you will eventually begin to notice reactions get a little weaker . This will encourage you to keep going. You still protect yourself from exposures that are too much but you gradually notice they get less and less.
The feeling of joy, peace or happiness, even tearful bittersweet happiness, conflicts with the brain pathways that produce MCS symptoms and weakens them. Annie hopper does a very good demonstration of how to go into memories to get in touch with positive emotions.

You do not have to be a slave to the programme if it seems too much. It should be your servant. Just do it as much as you can manage. It is just a tool to help retrain your brain. Anything I felt was not helpful I just left out and it still worked. There must be many ways to retrain one's brain and we are all different, but I hope you might be able to find the DNRS of some help since you already have it. I found it quite amazing that after 7 years of being almost completely housebound this began to work and now, the past few years, I can go anywhere I want. Please do not give up. Find any simple happy memories from before your illness and train yourself to feel the feeling you had then. Feel it and imagine it infusing your whole body and mind just for a few moments. and use this feeling in your pattern break.. For me I felt the power to weaken the overprotective MCS pathways was in the emotion.For a few moments different chemicals or brain pathways are being used.
There is hope. Look at all the video testimonials if you can to encourage yourself and believe in the possibility.
Last Edit: 1 week 3 hours ago by BL. Reason: too complicated
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On the brink 5 days 2 hours ago #3

Hey, I hope you are doing alright. I can relate a lot to your post because I had similar struggles. If you need to move but cannot work there are several ways to save up money. One way is to write articles online for sites like textbroker.com and also you can sign up for online college classes and take out loans. Hope things get better for you. Sorry if that's not much help but that is what I did in order to move to a better place with less asthma and allergy triggers. I think personally my multiple chemical sensitivity is more related to asthma and allergies because allergy medicine has helped me a lot. You could also apply for disability but that might be a lengthy process.
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On the brink 2 days 12 hours ago #4

  • skywayd
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Hi Tracey, I understand your pain more than you would think. Me and wifey are having to move out of our house due to mold. I have had mcs for 8 years and this will be our 3rd move. All I can suggest as a temp measure until you move is to make a room in the house as 'safe' for you as possible. I know you say you have no money though try to get some together, maybe from family or boyfriend and get yourself a hepa air purifier (though new ones affect me as I have to air out new things for months). I would have to get a used one off fleabay that is from a smoke free home and hope they havent been perfumed by the owners home. Hepa air purifiers will soak up mold spores. Respirators can really help for areas in the house that are bad but you have to travel into them to i.e. cook. I get 3M 4277 Spray Paint / vapour respirator off fleabay for about £17. Try to be out the house into fresh air as much as possible. Do some walking each day. Try to eat healthier and drink plenty of water if you are not already. I know these things can be very hard to do when you are at such a low ebb but please push yourself to do so. And please force out those negative ending life thoughts. It is an illness that can be at best recovered from as on here testifies, or controlled somewhat. It is a fight and you will gain strength by overcoming hurdles along the way. I feel for you and please keep us informed or feel free to ask as many questions as you want.
Regards
David
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